Rough week......

When I started this whole journey, I had a lot to learn about myself.  The nurses kept telling me that I would figure out what my issues were and I thought it was simple:  I ate too much of the wrong foods.  I'm in week 18 of my weight loss program and I've figured out that there was a whole lot more to my weight problem than food.

1.)  Understanding myself. Medically, I have hormonal issues that make me process food differently than normal.  It's a pretty common issue, but so many doctor's forget to screen for it.  Since being diagnosed, I've found so many other women who are suffering from the same issues.  Doctor's have told us for years to just "push back from the table" but we've all tried everything... I spent three months eating 900 calories a day... and it all comes down to chemistry.  We can't eat as much sugar. 

2.)  Perseverance. I have spent most of my life being fat.  In high school, I was overweight, but I was also at softball practice 10 months out of the year.  I could make bad choices and maintain my weight.... I was still bigger than I should have been, but at least I was steady.  Now, I've had to learn that when I lose the 10, 20, or 30 pounds, I have to keep going.  My problem became a 100-pound problem, so I need a 100-pound solution.

3.) Stress.  I thrive under pressure.  I absolutely love being busy--and I plan my week accordingly.  It's nothing for me to be in work, class, or a volunteer thing for most of my waking hours.  Since Mike works nights, I can usually cram it all in without missing our together time.  But as soon as something big hits (like watching Lezly fight for her life), I start making terrible choices and I eat when I can't find anything else to do to keep me busy.  This week, I gained 1.5 pounds.  In the past, I've been averaging a loss of at least 2 pounds a week....  I have to find a way to avoid the stress eating.

4.)  Focusing on the future without losing sight of the past.  I want to be back at my high school weight.  I want it badly.  I was 20 pounds overweight in high school, so I really don't think it's too ambitious to shoot for that weight again.  But I keep discouraging myself when I think about the 30 pounds I have left to lose and forget the 42 I already lost.  I have to find ways to reward myself for the success without stopping my progress completely.